Embrace Your Mess!

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Hello, My Thoughtful People!

Welcome back! Today, I want to delve into a topic that might seem counterintuitive at first, but bear with me: Embrace Your Mess!

Hmm, what does Sparkles mean by “Embrace Your Mess?” Yes, this is a topic we need to discuss and share, especially for our present and future generations. It seems people are becoming too sensitive nowadays and allow themselves to be drained with depressing and unpleasant thoughts that may lead to undesirable results (which you all know what I mean).
I will first share my definition of mess so you can easily understand when I use it within the context of this post. Mess can be referred to as an unpleasant past, situation, event, experience, habit, mistake, etc., which one is not proud of or does not want to revisit.
Now, it is understandable that this unpleasantness might lead to stigmatization and make one feel inferior. However, what will make one feel that way is because they fail to face it, i.e., embrace it. We all have been through one mess or the other, except you are not on this journey called life, so first, see it from that perspective. You then have to heal from that unpleasant past and give yourself some grace by forgiving yourself. It is not an easy process because you have to face it square on and embrace it, which is owning up to it. What do I mean by owning up to it? Take the courage to find lessons learned from it, knowing fully well that you have done something unimaginable or victimized by something terrifying; take the courage with sincere help to face it, embrace it, and own it! Will it take a process or time? OH YES! But it is a progressive approach, one day at a time. There might be some fallbacks, but get back on it, keep moving, do not stop, and heal to embrace that mess. This process of embracing your mess is not just about healing. It’s about empowering yourself to grow beyond your past or unpleasant situation.

Let me tell you what all these will do to your life. It will make you fully understand the lessons learned from that unpleasant experience and use that mess as a message for others not to fall victim or engage in unpleasant events/situations. Do you know how this attracts value to you? The mess one has experienced and was able to heal from it, learn from its experiences, embrace it, and use it as a message to others is adding value to others through the inspiration from their mess and how they overcame it. It will attract people to learn from their experiences. Does it make you vulnerable? NO! It actually shows a form of strength. Read my post on Redefining Masculinity: Why Expressing Emotions Is A Sign Of Strength to understand how vulnerability is a sign of strength. By sharing your mess, you are not just healing yourself but also inspiring and empowering others, raising a self-aware generation.

Also, turning your mess into a message is a sign of responsibility that you have taken to add value to others, which will bring honor to you. It works hand in hand. Most successful motivational speakers and top business individuals were able to share their mess (in the form of failures or setbacks), which brought value to others, and they were honored through compensation of some sort. To learn more about how responsibility brings honor, you can read my post, Unlocking The Power Of Responsibility: How Sacrifices Leads To Honor.
Most importantly, when you embrace your mess, no one can use it against you. What makes people think they can use your mess against you is that you make it obvious, shying away from it. Even though you are not proud of the mess or it was a shameful or embarrassing situation, learn to embrace and use it as a vessel to help others, and when they see it, they will not be able to use it against you anymore. What you have done is take away the weapon people can use against you, which makes you powerful over them and builds your confidence even with your “mess.” By embracing your mess, you are taking control of your narrative and not allowing others to define you by your past.

Lastly, an excellent way to view embracing your mess is this is your experience! Whether it was a past bad habit you were involved in or you were victimized, it is your experience, your mess, which you should not allow or give anyone the satisfaction to take ownership by allowing them to use it against you. Owing and embracing your mess will make people respectfully view you and make you easily trusted as someone who will tell the truth no matter how unpleasant it is.

So thoughtful people, I hope your sparkling minds can now be open-minded to face your mess, go through the process of healing from it by giving yourself some grace, own it, and embrace it! Again, do not allow anyone to take it away from you!
Let me know what you think about this post, or you can share an experience that you regard as a mess and how you were able to embrace it. Remember, you are in a community where we are here to learn from each other, so judging or looking down on anyone is unacceptable! You can also be anonymous if you want to, but we all want to learn and be empowered!
Remember….Stay Thoughtful!
6 Comments

  • Sparkles,

    I will officially call you, my thoughtful personality…haha!

    It’s summer and I try to truly find time to re-evaluate myself, mindset, etc. Going back to your posts on Value and the other one on building self confidence…

    Anyhoos…I have come to realize how something that is so unpleasant like a mess can become pleasant when one can embrace it, face it, and own it, as you posted, and use it as a resource like a message to help others. There is just something rewarding about it, and yes, it sure brings honor to someone. Reasons why its important to embrace our mess…using your term.

    So, just by the way, have you ever thought of starting your own podcast? The world needs to hear all your posts and more especially it will benefit parents, Gen Zs and our upcoming Gens. Food for thoughts 🤔…

    Stay Thoughtful, Sparkles…thank you! 🙏🏽

    Reply
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